Since the day we found out we were having twins, I've made a conscious effort to not let myself think about how my life would've been if I'd only had one baby. God blessed us with not one, but two babies. Why waste the mental energy thinking of a life that is not? But try as I might, these thoughts often creep into my mind.
These thoughts usually strike during moments of high stress - like when I'm home alone after a long day and Madeline is crying because she doesn't want to go to sleep and
then she wakes Emery. And all I want to do is take out my contacts and go to bed!
But they also strike at other times, like when I just want to sit and rock one baby but the other is fussing. Moms of singletons get to relish time with one baby without the added pressure of that other baby needing to be tended to (I realize it's only like with the first born but still!).
I know they say that the grass is always greener on the other side. And I wouldn't trade either of my babies for anything. And I know it will only get easier and that having twins can also be a lot of fun. But yet, I still wonder sometimes. And every time I wonder, I try to stop and thank God for both of my babies.